Trapped

I can't tell you how 
many times I almost 
unbuckled my seatbelt, 
pulled up the lock on 
my door to open it, 
and threw myself out 
of the car.  

I thought about how many 
seconds it would take me 
to do this-

how quickly I could make 
it happen,

and how to do it so you 
wouldn't be able to stop me.

I never did, only because 
there's people out there 
who need me to stay strong.

I thought about it though, 
how it would feel for my 
flesh to be ripped off 
my body as I hit the asphalt.

I told myself it wouldn't 
hurt as much as your 
relentless screaming.

But now, as I get to see 
the ones I love dearly 
everyday, and squeeze them...

It somehow makes all the 
pain worth it.  


-meb

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